Sunday, April 28, 2013

Overflowing my week...

I'm overflowing this week. And honestly, a bit overwhelmed!!
In fact... I feel somewhat bi-polar!!!

Do you ever have those days?  or those WEEKS??!!

I'm less than a week from our mock meet. It's not a legit federation meet. Mostly it's just to see what gains we've made from training with Brandon Lilly's "The Cube".
But in my mind.... It's legit. It's in front of Brandon Lilly himself for goodness sake!! How much more legit can you get?!!
It's a true test of strength.
And I'm a nervous wreck!!!

I've worked hard the past 10 weeks so I'm determined that I have gotten stronger. But for some reason, I'm not feeling very strong right now.
I'm nervous.
I'm unsteady
I'm unsure
Maybe physically strong, but oddly emotionally and mentally weak.

Then I weighed myself - and although I know you aren't supposed to "go by the numbers" - I know I weigh more now than ever.  And yeah yeah yeah... muscle weighs more than fat - but shouldn't I SEE some difference in my "fat"??
I'm not where I should be. And that's MY own fault only
Which makes me feel even weaker.

Add on top of that (my CRAP attitude) my attending freshman orientation for COLLEGE with my baby boy this week. I'm overJOYED for him. I'm proud. I'm excited. I'm happy...
But I'm also nervous
And a little bit broken :-/
You see it's been me and Z man for a long time.
He's my world. I raised him and watched him grow into such a fine young man.
He IS my pride and joy.
He is THE thing I have to show for my life!!
The one good thing I can be proud of.
The thing that through all of my bumps and bruises and mistakes growing up - that I have to show - that I did RIGHT!  :)

And in a few short months, he will open a new chapter in ha life... without me

Please don't get me wrong. I know he will still be in town and still my baby boy and I understand that this is how life works...
But it's truly kicking him out of the nest to watch him fly!!!
OR fall on his face.... which I did.... MANY times...

OH the horror!!!!

Anyway - I'm just kinda all over the place.


I am TRULY feeling BI-POLAR!!!!
(so watch out..... there's your warning)

You know that restaraunt - Lamberts I think it's called.  **correction - Dick's Last Resort**
Where the wait stuff talks to you like an idiot the entire time.

I want to try that in my work place.... that's the mood I'm in!!!

Today - I have aNOTHER patient that I almost came unglued upon!
here's the story....

ME:  "I'm going to step out the room, I need you to undress from the WAIST DOWN.  Here is a sheet to cover up with and then just have a seat on the bed"
PATIENT:  a few seconds later.... peeking head out the door "Do I need to take my bra off?"
ME:  "No."   (in my head - what I wanted to say was.... "I don't know... where to YOU wear YOUR bra because mine is NOT below my waist?")

Do you think that would be considered good patient care???  :)

Welcome to my overwhelmed overjoyed underinflated bi-polar world!

Bring on the week!!!

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