SHEman?!! By the POWER of grayskull!

Thanks for the inspiration KK!  ;-)

What is your obsession?
your passion?
Where's your loyalty?
your commitment?

What's the freaking difference??

When is enough... enough?

I have had so many people tell me I'm crazy.  I've had people tell me I'm over the top.  I've had people tell me I'm extreme.  and... obsessed!  People laugh and make jokes about me flexin... (oh trust me.... when I CAN, and I WILL be able to.. impressively ... you can bet your BUTT that I will be!)
Anyway.... It's cool.
Maybe you DO think it's too much... maybe you DO think I'm gonna end up like the chick in that pic!!??
Maybe?
maybe you actually believe that!??

But you don't know.

You don't know that what I do is not an obsession... it IS however a PASSION.  It IS something you have to be committed to and LOYAL to!  It is something that requires giving up certain things.
And it is a game of being educated about what you do!!!

No one wakes up one morning and just walks into a gym and picks up 500 pound barbells off the ground. No one wakes up one morning and looks like the chick in that picture (or WANTS to!  :-p  ha ha)

what you DO wake up to is the DESIRE to be better.
The desire to win.
The desire to fight and not give up.
The desire to be stronger
The desire to be better today than you were yesterday.j
You wake up.... PASSIONATE!!!  (ok - maybe you don't actually WAKE UP that way...  well... I don't anyway - cause I don't wake up ANYTHING.... I barely wake up at all!)  ha ha
    but once I'm up for a bit.... LOOK OUT!
I'm all about some passion!  :))

When I started lifting, I had no idea what a "deadlift" even was....
And the only squatting I had ever done did not involve much weight - and if it did involve any weight, it sure wasn't sitting on my back trying to knock me over.  I threw my hands out in front of me to balance....
And you want me to hold WHAT... WHERE???
How am I supposed to hold a barbell on my back AND balance myself with my hands out in front??
And benching....... what a joke?  I had never been under a bench press EVER!!  I thought guys stood around in the gym comparing... ummmmm .... the size of their.... TRUCKS!!  or BENCH?!!  :)
So why would I.... a GIRL wanna bench press???

Oh how things change in a year....
And it's funny how passion grows where passion didn't exist before?
It's amazing the things that your body is capable of... and we sit around having NO IDEA!!!!

We were sitting at home (before gym time) last night watching Extreme Weight Loss.  I don't know how many of you have ever seen that or even care...... but it seriously blows my mind.
It blows my mind that we are literally capable of soooooo much more than we do!!
I watched a set of twins last night drop hundreds of pounds between the two of them.
I watched dedication and commitment and a DESIRE to better themselves!!
yes....... I used the word "better"
Maybe that is politically UNcorrect....
but facts are facts.  Let's face it.

At over 300 pounds... imagine what you are doing to your body every day.  You work every muscle so much harder.  Your organs have to work harder.  And your body will wear out.  Sooner than later.
So it's not so much about the vanity of it all.... but the passion to be a better YOU!!!
Why is that so hard for people to understand?

After watching this show, we headed off to the gym... fired up for bench night.
For those of you who have read anything I have written about working out - bench has been my nemesis.  I had tried and tried to break the 100 barrier forever it felt like.  Weeks ago I went to Berea to train with the infamous Brandon Lilly.  And I DID break that barrier.
But it was weeks ago..... months ago....
And I was kinda freaking out because I hadn't done it again since then.
Well last night - on rep night.... after set after set of reps - I shot for that 100 again.
AND I GOT IT!!!!!!
And you may be rolling your eyes right now... thinking who cares?  or you may be thinking 100 pounds... big whoop... that's nothing!!!
But you see.... I care and it IS a big deal to me.

It is living proof that I am better today than I was when I started in this sport.
It IS living proof that hard work and dedication DO pay off.
It IS living proof that I can keep getting better.
It is living proof that lifting heavy weights WON'T kill me or "break my back" or "make me old"...

It is PROOF that I TRAIN...... not just work out.

It is PROOF that I can ALWAYS be better!
So can you!!!!!

If you had told me at that meet I competed at less than 6 months ago that I could bench 105, that I could deadlift 230, or that I would ever EVER be able to squat a bar... much less 185 pounds, I most definitely would have thought you crazy!!!

So am I crazy?  Maybe, but that was there before powerlifting!
Am I obsessed?  Maybe... and maybe you should be too!
Am I committed?  YES - is that a crime?
Am I loyal?  YES.  You have to be

Am I EVER going to look like that SHEman in that picture??????
Thankfully no!
I can lift like a beast and still look like a lady!

Now what's YOUR excuse?

Here's my 100 bench....  I will do that and then some June 15th!

And just for fun... this is 95 pounds for 3.... watch that last one - I downshifted one time!  ha ha

Being a grown up SUX!

I don't WANT to grow up!!

I hate making responsible decisions.
I hate it
Can I go back to being... Oh I don't know, 16??!  So I can drive but still let someone else be responsible?  And someone else can pay the bills and make decisions... that way when they are bad decisions - I can blame someone else!!!  Yes - perfect!

Why were we all in such a dang hurry to grow up anyway??

My plans were to drive to OH this weekend to the Arnold. I wanna meet Dana Linn Bailey. Did I mention that?!!
So I entered that contest and if you won, the training with her would be Monday the 4th. Right after "Arnold".
the perfect... irresponsible weekend

But alas.... I did not win

I knew the odds were slim
612 people entered

But it still hurts. 

It's still disappointing

To lose

To know someone was more "motivational" to work out with than you...

Blahhhhhh

What?!!  I'm not bitter!

sigh.........

So, in my disappointment, I thought, I don't have the extra money to run off to OH for the weekend anyway
I don't have my money tree up and growing so I really should stay home anyway
And go do my own inspirational work out

I really SHOULD be responsible

Right?!!

But I still wanna meet her!!!
And I still wanna see Caitlyn Trout lift. And Brandon Lilly. And the Lilliebridge's.  and on... and on.... and on.....

So... My compromise? (as Brad put it...)

Get up at the crack of dawn Saturday morning ( I'm sooooo not a morning person ) and drive to Columbus. Spend the day getting my fill of body building and power lifting, AND MEET DANA LINN BAILEY... then drive back home. It eliminates hotel expense. Which was adding up quickly!!!!

So I guess I could use this disappointment to sit at home and pout all weekend OR use it and turn it into DRIVE to push harder and do MORE.... right??

I want to SEE gains!
I want to be inspirational... (stomping foot!)
I want other people to look at me and be inspired to push harder

Hey....I know!!!!!
How about I punish myself enroll in a boot camp on top of my already scheduled gym sessions!

WHY NOT!????!

So for 6 weeks (at least)  - I'll work out SEVEN DAYS A WEEK
Look out summer - here come my ABS!!!!!

Work
Hustle
KILL yo!!!!!

Did you just call me a liar?

Try and tell me that commitment isn't worth it

Or that working out can't be fun

Or that being committed TO working out doesn't work.

OR that there is any negative side to either: 
commitment or working out.

I will call YOU a liar SIR!

My obliques are CRYING for help today.
OUCH
They hurt.
Like I've been punched in the ribs like a punching bag....HURT

And it's GREAT!
WHAT?!!
Yep - it's fantastic.  Because I know I'm WORKING and I know that the work I'm doing is making changes in my body!

When I started this journey months ago - I had no idea what I was in for.
Or what I would learn... on so many levels.

I read a blog today - posted by Brandon Lilly - cube-bench-team-and-chatter regarding the gym and working out and the crew you work out with... and how you become a family.   And it brought a small tear to my eye.  (yes - I know.... EVERYTHING brings tears to my eyes.... I'm sensitive... soooo???)

Anyway - I realized once again - I am VERY lucky.
And once again I will thank God for bringing me through what He has brought me through for He knew where I would land.  And He knew what I needed.
And he OBVIOUSLY knew how strong I needed to be to get here.....  mentally and emotionally... and now even physically!!

When I started working out with these guys - I was so NOT happy about it.  I'm the only girl there.  And hello girls... as if being in the gym isn't intimidating enough... worrying about what you look like and if you're doing something wrong or right... so many things that you have NO idea about.  And then - I go in and listen to these guys yelling at each other.  YES.  Yelling.
Now - for those of you who know me, you KNOW I don't like to be put on display. I can do just about anything.... on my own.  Without an audience.  I'm not a public speaker or performer or whatever.   It makes me insecure for people to watch.
AND I'm sensitive.  Don't yell at me.  Good or bad... don't yell at me.   I'm my own worst critic and when I can't do something - it makes me mad.  And yes... sometimes I cry.  Because I'm frustrated.  At myself.  And then you yell at me to keep going?  {{Insert tears!}}
It was SCARY!!!
SO - When I saw that they did all these lifts together.... watching and critiquing... and cheering... I thought "NOPE"   Not for me.  I can't do this.   I don't need someone "pushing me" or cheering for me.  Just don't watch me.... or talk to me..... I'll be fine.

Or so I thought.

I was wrong.

THAT is what drives you.

YELL.  AT.  ME.     
PUSH.  ME!!!

When you are pushing the very depth of all you have left in you... when you are scraping the bottom of your tank and think you can't do ONE MORE SQUAT.  Then you hear "Come on Tammy.... push...."   There is nothing that drives you harder.
Your group
Your "boys"
Your support

Even when anyone or everyone has made me mad or hurt my feelings.... one yell to push me through washes it all away.
And then you hear "good work"
and all is well again.

There are nights in the gym when I want to punch someone in the face.  There are nights when I don't feel strong and I want to go off in the corner and work alone.  But it's those nights that one of the boys says something... anything to me... that reminds me how close knit this sport is and how we are always looking out for one another.

There really is nothing like it.

And the best part is that spirit carries over into EVERYone of those boys lives.

**sidenote**  For all you single girls out there - looking for a "GOOD" guy..... start at a power lifting meet.  I don't know that you can find a better man with a bigger heart anywhere out there

Are you calling me a liar?

Try it.

And just so you know Brandon Lilly - my girl crush IS and will remain Dana Linn Bailey... I mean - hello - have you SEEN HER????  (ha ha) 
BUT you Brandon - INSPIRE me today....   and I want to thank you for that.
You are the epitome of what this sport breeds.... an unending desire to not only make yourself better and stronger, but to also watch everyone around you get better and stronger and PUSH them to do so!

Does this video make my butt look big?!

I hope so!!! 
 I've worked hard for it!! 8-)

** side note**  and THAT -------> is NOT my butt!!!

I did it. I put myself out there.
I'm doing everything I can to get better and stronger to meet my goals for 2013!
(and maybe a few bucket list items too!)

So I put myself on YouTube!
(my mother will just die.... LOL)

Remember when I posted 3...2...1... Here We Go about the contest and trying to win a work out session with my girl crush  fitness role model Dana Linn Bailey?!
To enter the contest, you have to submit pictures, an essay of why you should be picked and a "optional" video
So I threw together a video
Because I'm all about going above and beyond the call of duty... AND I wanna win! Duhhhh

My video is not all sexy and abs and foofoo girlie girl.
 It's all strong. It's WORK. It's hard
Just the way I like it!!
I didn't want a video that you looked at and said "dang she's hot"
I wanted my video to say  "Dang she's strong.. and works HARD!"
So that's what I put together

And I thought I would share
See what y'all think
Questions... comments... CRITICISM
Whatever?!!

ENJOY!!!

Motivational Monday from my Motivational Weekend!!

As women we are so judgmental and caught up in a society based on looks. It is WE who drive that so hard... More so than men. We are so hard on ourselves!
Just think about when you get ready to go out somewhere. You get dressed up and do your best to look good... And slender... And young...
Not so much for men, but for the fear of someone saying "gosh can you believe how big Tammy looks!" Oh the horror!!!!

Honestly, that "horror" is what drove me to start working out
Lets be honest, that is what drives most of us to the gym
Now granted, other things are taken into consideration.... Health, not wanting to buy bigger clothes, post baby weight, and many others...
But ultimately, I think it's because we are so worried about what others (stupid girls) think!

In going back to the gym this time, I have been taken down a different path
I started power lifting
In the beginning it was humorous to me. The idea. Calling myself a power lifter.
Imagining what "power lifters" look like.
Well....
I competed in my second competition this weekend; this was my first real life "sanctioned" full power meet. Which ultimately means soon I will be able to go to the SPF (southern power lifting federation) website and my name will be listed there. Me. Tami G. I'll have a ranking as a US power lifter. How cool is that?!!
It's pretty awesome!!!

But the coolest part is this: with the men AND women at these meets, even being so new to this sport, even being so self conscious about looks, and not being strong enough, and whatever other dumb thing us women worry about- I can't say I have ever felt such a camaraderie anywhere else. Everyone there helps each other and cheers for each other and genuinely cares that you DO good!! It truly is a team sport even though you lift alone. It's just YOU on that platform. With 100 people screaming behind you. Wishing you a good lift
It's indescribable. And coming from someone with stage fright who doesn't like to be in front of people... that's saying a lot!!

Motivation at its finest

I've "gymmed" it before
I've wanted to lose weight, and build abs and look GOOD before
But on this path, I truly want to be strong. And everyone else wants that too. And we work together to push each other to meet goals
It's not cut-throat, it's motivation and esteem building at its best

This weekend I saw guys lift 800+ pounds! I saw a male and female lift enough to get their "Pro" cards. They will be "names" in this sport to follow.
And I saw them qualify.
This weekend I saw an 11 year old tiny little girl dead lift 200 pounds!!!
And in a room full of strong burly power lifters, I bet there wasn't one dry eye in the room when her eyes filled with tears.... So proud!!!

It truly is the most motivating, accepting, loving, non-judgemental atmosphere I have ever experienced!!!

If there is something you want out of life, or somewhere you wanna go in life, spend some time with a group of power lifters!!! There can't be a better group of motivators to push you to where you want to be in life!!! There just can't!

I am thankful to have a boyfriend with that exact same character not just about lifting, but about everything in life!!! He is never anything short of lifting me up!!
And I'm lucky enough to have just as good of a group of guys to work out with too... now if I could just wrangle me up some girls!!!

Happy Monday everyone!!!

This week, don't judge people. Instead take some time to push someone to be better. Take some time to build their self esteem. And make a choice to push yourself to be better and want more!
Never stop reaching and growing, because when you do, what's left to live for?!!

Have a GREAT WEEK!!!!

For those interested, I had a great meet this weekend!!!
I was pushing for a 450 lb total and walked away at 460!
90 bench. 145 squat. 225 deadlift
My unitard did me proud!!!
Couldn't be happier!

Next step for me....
Meeting Dana Linn Bailey and Rob next month at the Arnold Classic!!!
My #1 motivator/role model and GIRL CRUSH!!!! (Cheeeeese!!!!)

GO HARD OR GO HOME!!