Wednesday, May 15, 2013

I'm an Adult - now WHAT?!

Well - it's finally here... the day I have dreaded.
(I remember being young and it was THE one day I most looked forward to)
But as a mother... it's scary
Actually - it's invigorating and empowering and a great BIG hunk of pride....
and... yeah ..... also.......SCARY as crap!!!

I mean - let's face it... I've put in the time.
I've worked hard
I've made sacrifices
I've prayed
I've cried
I've smiled
I've laughed
I've worried
I've questioned
I've wondered....

And now it's here.
It's "Official"!!!

My baby is 18!!
A "legal" adult
At "draft" age
Old enough to buy a lottery ticket
Old enough to sign a contract and be held legally responsible
Old enough to file his own taxes and claim his own income.
Old enough for college.

It seems like only yesterday we were starting day care, then school, making Dr. Seuss cakes, then tee ball, potty training with M&Ms, and sports physicals (turn and cough!  ha ha)
I can't believe how the time has flown.... I still feel like I just got out of high school myself
(you people KNOW I CLEARLY have no sense of TIME.... that was almost 20 years ago!!!)

Nonetheless.... here it is.

My sweet little bouncing baby boy is now officially 18
He has senior prom this weekend.
He graduates high school in just a few short weeks.

And then after a vacation, and a SKYDIVE (his 18th birthday present) - he will move out.... and be IN COLLEGE!
Part of me will die a little on the inside when he leaves.
It's been me and him forEVER.
The house will feel so empty... and I will worry  (not that I don't now) but I will worry what this world will do to him.
How will it treat him?
Will it chew him up and spit him out?
How will he handle the responsibility of college and LIFE on his own?
Will he sleep?
Will he party?
Will he go to class when he's supposed to?

Is he STRONG enough to handle whatever life has to throw at him??!!

Oh I worry.....
And it scares me almost as much as the first day of kindergarten!

But at the same time..... I'm so proud
Proud of what we have done.
We made it Zack man.  We made it.
Through taking a cab to day care and work because that's the only means of transportation we had.
Through waiting tables and praying for tips just so I could pay rent and keep food on the table.
Through baseball fees and uniforms and traveling and all the expense that entailed.
Through diapers and formula to shoes and clothes for a constantly growing boy!
Through me going to school and trying to juggle jobs and school and never miss a beat with you!

We made it.

And on this day - I could not be any prouder or any happier for YOU!!!

Congrats on yet another milestone of a million more to come

Your life is laying like an open book in front of you
Live your life to the fullest
Write your own story
Be all that you ever wanted to be

I raised you to believe that NOTHING is impossible!

Now go live out ALL your dreams!!!

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