Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Ohhhh... now I know!

Growing up - we ALL knew everything.
You NEVER believed that grown ups were smarter than you.  I mean - hello - didn't we know it ALL!!!??
I did!
...and I would be the first to tell you!
I knew how things worked.... I knew how to do everything.... I knew what the consequences were... and most of the time, I really couldn't have cared less!
Grown ups were stupid and they DEFINITELY didn't know how to have fun.
And gosh they were always planning and setting goals and being all responsible and crap.
Who needs that?!!

Man - OH MAN - I wish I could go back and know what I know now.

As a mother now - I find myself trying to steer my son one way over another... trying to teach him to be responsible for himself.  To think ahead.  To plan ahead.  To be independent.  To work towards something.  Have a goal.  Have a passion (and that's NOT sitting in a dark room all night playing video games!)  PRIORITIZE!!!!
The things that "seem" important in most teenage eyes are NOT.
They just aren't.
Although at the time, it might just feel like LIFE OR DEATH..... trust me when I say.... NO!  It's NOT!

What IS life and death??

Having priorities.  Having goals.  Pushing yourself.  Taking care of YOU and not worrying what others around you are doing or planning.

As a kid - even though I knew it all... there were still things I wondered about.   But I wouldn't DARE ask someone.  I would figure them out on my own.
*I did after all - have my "I know everything" reputation to uphold!*
Guess what?
I usually figured wrong.
I had no direction.
I was all go with the flow.... ehhhhhh whatever.

That attitude....didn't get me far.
In fact - it got me nowhere quite fast.
Spinning my wheels... wondering why life didn't get easier?

So, what did?

When I sucked it up and realized - I am responsible for ME!
It is MY job to pay the bills and buy the house and work the job and buy the clothes and buy the groceries and put gas in the truck and on and on and on......

So I set some goals.
I changed my life path....
(and I still change it almost daily.)

Oh sure - some things are constant... but they are constant because I finally REACHED them as a goal.
Everything that I have in my life started with one little glimmer one sun-shiny day when I realized... 
"this is what I want and THIS is how I will get it"

And most importantly it started with LOSING that "I know everything" mentality and realizing that I didn't just KNOW everything.  There are people out there that have actually been through this.  And they know the right v wrong path to take.  And if I will just sit down and prioritize on what is important, I too - will find that right path.
And so I did.

But I look for new paths all the time.

The key to growing up is never giving up the ability to grow.
You become a better person every day.
You learn EVERY day.
You make (hopefully) better choices every day.
You learn from experience.
You learn from mistakes
but most importantly - you LEARN that you DON'T know everything and that is OK.

I, on a regular basis have moments when I think....... "Ohhhhhhh..... Now I know!"
And those moments.... yeah - I live for them!

My most recent one.....
I never understood why people did things that induce vomiting.
I HATE to puke.
(is that clear enough?)
Both of my brothers ran cross country.... and for anyone who has ever work the "PUKE CHUTE" - you understand the vomit inducing sport of cross country all too well.

WHYYYYY would someone WANT to run so hard and so far that you THROW UP????


Guess what I have learned......
(wait for it.....)
YES - I have always wondered what it would feel like to literally work out to the brink of puking.....
and.... NOW I KNOW!
and......I wondered WHY anyone would WANT to work so hard that you are at the brink of puking.... I know!


There is no greater joy than to know that YOU worked for where you are.  No one put you there... no one snuck you through the system... no one did the work for you.... no one made excuses for you and told you "it's ok"....
Someone PUSHED you.
YOU pushed YOU.
and you reached your goal.
No one can teach you that.
and no one can take it away.

Someone go back and tell my stupid teenage "I know everything" self that!

ohhhhhh...... NOW I know!
And every day I understand life just a little bit better!

{{PS - I know, according to yesterday's blog, My Inspirational Weekend I was supposed to be sharing some news today - but I had to share this first.... before ... so that you can understand the magnitude of the impact of the information that I am about to unleash on you!!}}

Wait .... for ..... it.....

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